Most people who act like bullies...
really need a hug...
they have not been treated kindly
and need to be shown what a kind parent
who is in the best interest of all concerned would do...
because they did not have such a parent.
So be the compassionate adult
who has come to keep the peace...
and stand up for what is best for all concerned -
for the good of everyone - including all the generations to come.
Art Of Disarming The Bully -
(within & around us)
3. Give an "out with dignity"
4. Negotiate Fairly - listening to everyone
everyone gets a voice
(It's not over until everyone feels better!)
6. Co-Create A Resolution Plan
7. Visualize The Resolution Action Together
("I can see you..)
(After Action Taken)
8. Feedback on the Results
9. Adjustment (if needed)
10. Celebration for
Accomplishment & Growth
This is an
organic process.. allow yourself to be in a space of service
and you will
be shown the perfect example
and the best time to connect with them about
People act like bullies because they were bullied by others
believe that that is the only way
to motivate people to do what they
Inspiration of someone who lives what they speak
is the only real motivation
- everything else backfires.
And knowing that people do want what's good for them -
it does not need to be forced.
please wait until the person in question has behaved
in a way that is
without question not good for the group..
or themselves or the relationship
and save this as an concrete example.
It's usually best not to talk to them at that time
because they will
be much more defensive about it
and for sure not when others are around.
Patiently wait until you are have a connected moment
or at least there
is a relative ease in the interactions.
Then, ask them if it's a good
time to talk
(or when that might be) and if you could go somewhere in
private so you won't be interrupted.
3. Give an "out with dignity"
good to begin by telling them how much
you can see that they care about the family,
business, marriage, or whatever community
that you both are part of.
And that you know they care
about how they do -
it's good to remember something
they do really well
and tell them about it.
Be sure not to sound patronizing...
BE SINCERE or don't do it. In fact,
you must really like something about the person
or it's best not to do this either.
Then, ask them if they are interested in your insight about something that happened recently.
If they say yes, then again tell them that you know they want what's best for everyone and if there is a quality that you honestly admire about them - this is a good time to say something about it.
When you fell a sense of rapport - then continue with telling them aobut the example that you witnessed and how it made your feel and that you know they didn't intend to make you fell that way yet that you feel it is not best for all involved to handle things that way.
Then see what they have to say... and really listen.
A SPECIAL THANK YOU TO JON STEWART & THE DAILY SHOW
FOR LEADING THE WAY WITH COMPASSIONATE HUMOR
THAT GIVES US THE REAL NEWS.
THEY ARE THE BEST AT SHOWING THE HYPOCROCY
AND ALL THE HONEST DETAILS THAT SHOW
THE AGENDA BEHIND THE AGENDA.
JON'S SHOW IS POWERFUL BECAUSE IT SHOWS HOW WE ARE ALL CONNECTED
AND WHY WHAT IS HAPPENING IS NOT GOOD FOR THE WHOLE PLANET &
THE WHOLE WORLD IS WATCHING THE DAILY SHOW BECAUSE OF THAT FACT.
LET THE DAILY SHOW INSPIRE YOU TO KNOW
THROUGH THEIR LIGHT HEARTED HUMOR
HOW IT IS TIME NOW TO SHOW OUR HUMANITY &
HOW MUCH WE ALL REALLY CARE ABOUT OUR COUNTRY
& RESTORE OUR SANITY FOR EVERYONE'S SAKE -
AS WE LOVINGLY "JUST SAY NO!"
NOW IS THE TIME...
LIKE NEVER BEFORE IN HISTORY... TO LOVINGLY DISARM THE BULLIES IN POLITICS.
POLITICS NEEDS REASONABLE, HARD WORKING PEOPLE - TO SPEAK UP NOW!
Jon Stewart of the Daily Show has shown us what this looks like
when he interviews people with obvious contrary views.
He is opening dialog and showing how reasonable those to the left can be while holding our ground about being there for those who have valid needs. Many are now homeless & jobless from to bailouts that we were told were needed - then we found out it was due to thoughtless spending and the carelessness of those in power.
It was one thing to borrow money from China to bail us out - something we will pay for in many ways... for many years. Yet to add insult to injury the G.O.P. wants to take away the Federal aid programs that can help these people through the economic crisis- that they did not create.
Wall Street, AIG, and other Big Businesses made it happen... took the bail out and ran... they had a great year... and the wealthiest Americans got their tax breaks
only to lead more middle class to financial ruin... how can we allow this to happen?
Let us show that we are articulate & considerate,
while we show that we have the facts and are not afraid to use them.
THIS IS THE WAY TO SHOW THEM
OUR INNER STRENGTH IS STRONGER
THAN THE FEAR THEY WOULD LIKE US TO HAVE -
THAT FOX NEWS TRIES TO OFFER.
AND IN OUR LIFETIME... WE SHALL KNOW PEACE -
A SUSTAINABLE PEACE BASED ON A LOVE OF HUMANITY & OUR PLANET...
& LIVING WHAT IS HUMANE BECAUSE IT IS GOOD FOR EVERYONE - REALLY - NOT JUST BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT LEADERS ARE SAYING.
IT IS TIME TO LOVINGLY - FOR THE SAKE OF WHAT IS BEST FOR US ALL -
DISARM THOSE WHO ARE ACTING LIKE BULLIES - AND SHOW THEM THAT IT IS NOT WHO THEY ARE - IT IS THEIR BEHAVIOR...
AND THEY ARE BETTER THAN THIS... LET'S SHOW THEM THAT WITH LOVE.
WHEN WE NEGOTIATE WITH WHAT IS FAIR FOR EVERYONE...
NOT JUST THOSE IN POWER - OR THOSE WITH THE MOST MONEY -
WE HAVE THE FORCE OF LOVE BEHIND US - AGAPE LOVE -
THAT IS STRONGER THAN WHAT SEEMS TO BE MORE FORCEFUL.
IT IS JUST NOT GOOD FOR THE PLANET TO DO WHAT IS GOOD
ONLY FOR THE FEW... ANYMORE... OR EVEN FOR THE VERY ONES WHO ARE ACTING GREEDY AT THIS TIME AND MAY JUSTIFY THEIR ACTIONS WITH GOOD MOTIVES.
SO FOR THEIR SAKE AND THE REST OF THE PLANET...
AND EVERYONE ONE IT... IT IS TIME FOR ALL OF US TO CALL ON THOSE WHO WE VOTED INTO POWER TO SERVE US& ASK THEM TO SERVE ALL OF US
OR WE WILL FIND THOSE WHO WILL DO THAT.