A Letter Writing Tool
Resolving a conflict(s) with someone from the inside out.

If you have an unresolved conflict with someone (living or dead) this process may be very helpful. Taking the conversation into an “as if” situation where they don’t interrupt and/or respond with comments that add to the conflict. Imagine how empowering it is to be in a conversation where we can go back and change what we said. In addition, the healing aspects of speaking to someone (with unlimited edits) who we have unresolved issues with, in our own time according to our needs, where we can go on uninterrupted, and they especially don’t talk back with comments that can through us off our purpose of healing the relationship.

Communicating with our conscious mind: as we sift through trying to be right or prove a point - we come down to the only real reason to write the letter, to heal the relationship. However, being able to process why we feel we are right and/or being able to express the feelings of how much we were hurt by what someone has said or done to us - in a letter that we don’t send can be very healing. This way we are able to vent negative emotions, without the repercussions of saying something that we may regret later. Also, the fact that any time we feel we need to speak to this person - we can, through the ongoing letter we continue to edit every time we need to speak to them. Through writing a letter(s) (and re-writing again and again until we feel resolved) that we may never send or perhaps one day - after we’ve clear out what our projection of the conflict is and get down to healing our connection with the person.

Communication with our subconscious mind: as we revise the letter(s) each time we work on it - we are able to see our inner thoughts mature as the process allows us to come to peace with the person and issues of conflict surrounding the person(s). It’s important to allow as much time as we need to work on the letter(s) as well as working on ourselves in other ways as well so that we understand why we respond the way we do – where did the fear come from? If we are honest with who we really are (Love) we get more & more compassionate towards them. As we begin watching how we grow by how we speak through the letter... we learn to speak for the relationship’s sake in the name of love. Because we are able to take a good look at how and where we tend to get emotionally reactive we begin to see how in the past may not have re-acted with our best behavior. It is important to say that we are not our behavior – who we are, is so much more and this transparenting process will help you get down to who we really are.

Outward Resolutions: Because we know that we have gone through a process of letting go of the hurt, and blame from the past and we are now ready to be in the present with who we are now. If and when we finally do speak to the person, (or if we finally decide to send the letter) we know exactly what we want to say and how to say it and even more so, what we don't want to say because the letter writing has been our rehearsal.